Having Kids

Same sex couples have to think carefully about how to have their kids – conception doesn’t just happen by accident, so specialised fertility counselling can be very helpful in the planning stages as well as at various other times during the process of building your family.

Some gay and lesbian families are formed by fostering and adoption, but more commonly lesbians and gay men are either bringing kids into relationships (and managing all of the usual step-family dynamics), or having kids themselves via at home inseminations or interacting with fertility clinics, often using donor sperm or surrogacy.

Even when infertility is not an issue and the process all goes beautifully smoothly, it can be helpful to have supportive people around while you are trying to conceive. Friends and family can be invaluable at this time and seeing a specialist fertility counsellor may also assist the journey by helping you to:

  • consider issues you might not have thought about otherwise eg. how might a future child feel about being donor conceived and how might this be best managed?
  • learn coping strategies such as relaxation or self hypnosis to use during medical procedures;
  • find ways to manage those periods of time when you have to wait to find out whether a cycle was successful or not;
  • create a safe space to acknowledge the grief often associated with infertility eg. if there are miscarriages or failed cycles;
  • communicate with your partner about what is happening so that you can stay close and connected during the process;
  • clarify what you are feeling and come to decisions about important things like how long to continue treatment and when to consider other options;
  • meet in a formal setting to explore options and draw up agreements eg. with a potential donor or co-parent.

For counselling at any stage of your fertility journey, make an appointment today.